Good lord.  I've been taking E to the pool pretty much every day now (unless it's rainy/stormy, etc.)  It's a block away.  Our rental company covers the fees because it's an HOA / community pool, so it's free!  I was there the other day, sitting on the bench while my daughter squealed with glee in the kiddie pool.  I looked down and saw a freak-load of freckles on my legs.  I have them on my arms/shoulders and used to have a lot on my face growing up, but never on my legs.  Never.  And now?  Freckles gallore.

Here's a pic.  Unfortuntely, it was hard for me to capture the freckles in the right light, so I ramped up the contrast to bring them out.  I'm not kidding.  Just send me to Sawyer and we'll get rid of the other Freckles.  Mmm, yeah.

Click on the pic for the bigger one.  You can see 'em better.

Sometimes I think that I'm not really a happy person unless I'm going 15 things at once.  I've formally applied to the teaching licensure program at CSU.  My schedule for the next 2 years is going to be friggin' insane.  I'll have my 3 MFA classes per semester.  I have 7 classes that are pre-req's that I must complete by next Fall.  Then, I have the lisencure classes themselves.

Fall Semester:
1 class through CU online (pre-req.) - Shakespeare for majors
1 pre-req - Teaching Reading
MFA - 3 classes

Spring Semester:
MFA - 3 classes
1 pre-req - Adolescent Lit.
1 pre-re1 - Teaching Composition

Summer Semester
Phase 1:
3 Licensure Classes
Phase 2:
4 Licensure Classes

Fall (2010)
MFA (3) - including a "how to teach creative writing class" and a form/technique class. 
2 Pre-req's - Grammar class / Survey of American Literature Class

Spring 2011
MFA (3)
3 licensure classes

Fall 2011
Student Teaching

Now, each semester, I'll be helping teach the workshops at the county detention center.
I'm going in for a job interview tomorrow for a part time job.  It will be teaching adults Microsoft Office.
I have a 2 year old.
I have a husband.
I need sleep.
I still need to write.

Gonna be a fun ride!

It's been a while since I've done some photos.  I took a few tonight while downtown with the family.

Surrender!


Reflection


Reflection #2


Self Portrait

E and the flowers


Swinging!


Just for kicks.  :)


A fun place J and I want to check out sometime...
 

I've been thinking a lot about my first year in the MFA program at CSU.  The thing is, most of what I'm contemplating isn't good.  When I entered into the program, I was under the impression that I would really be working on the elements of my craft, gaining insight into creative criticism and learning more about the nuts and bolts of creative writing.  In terms of workshop alone, I am coming away from the first year with a great deal of frustration.  I'm disheartened by the whole experience on a whole.

The first semester of workshop was the hardest.  My story was up first for workshop.  I offered to go first because I had some material ready to go that I had written over the summer.  The folks who had been in the program for a year already (we'll call them 2nd year peeps,) pretty much destroyed the story.  I've had stories mauled and broken apart in the past, but never in a really nasty way.  It was like they discussed things before class and said, "let's make sure we teach these first years who's boss."  It was that bad.  I had people coming up to me after class saying, "I really don't want to go now.  Geesh, that was harsh.  Are you ok?"

I was fine.  I know my work is solid. 

The bad part about going first is that I couldn't really judge my fellow writers.  You can tell a lot about someone by what they write.  You tend to listen more to the writers who have a grasp of their craft, who write in a similar style as you (or who take risks and aren't afraid of failing.)  You can always tell who is serious and who isn't.  And by the end of the first semester, I had a list in my head:

List 1: the people I completely ignore because they're clueless or purposely nasty. 
List 2: the people who sometimes get it and sometimes don't, but have a good comment or two on occasion. 
List 3: the people who get it, but have "likes and dislikes" that are too rigid for them to really open themselves up.  For example, I wrote a short story in 2nd person and one girl hates 2nd person stories, so she pretty much disliked the entire thing.
List 4:  the people who get it, who really rock, who love their craft, who fail miserably at times and succeed just as often.  The people who pay attention, who offer wonderful insight, who are respectful.

Thankfully, most of my fellow first years fall onto list 4. A few do not, but they are more lazy and/or antisocial for the most part and usually don't offer much in terms of class discussion anyway.  But, they're not bad peeps, just kind of scattered to the four-winds at times.

Most of the second year students fell into the nasty categories.  As the semester progressed, this became more and more evident.

The second semester, it was well-nigh hammered into place: nailed down, glued on.  They're jerks.  That was really the final assessment.  There was one exception, a girl in class named Mandy.  Mandy is one of those people who can whip out a short story in 2 hours and dazzle everyone.  She's sweet, kind, insightful and sickeningly GOOD at what she does.  She wins all the program contests, scholarships, gets published once a month.  Yeah, one of those kind.  But, she never reminds you of her successes, never rubs it in and always has amazing feedback to give you on your stories.  She is what I expected 2nd year MFA students to be.    The rest seemed like wastes of air.

So, that dynamic followed us through two semesters.  I finally got up the nerve to talk to a few of the first years about their experiences and learned (gasp) that most of them felt exactly the same way. 

The silver lining in all of this is that we all agreed to welcome the first year folks this year (as we are not the second year peeps.)  We will welcome the living heck out of them.  We've decided to meet once a week (or every other week,) at a designated place to discuss writing or life or whatever we want--to get to know one another.  We will take them under our wings and show them the ropes, encourage them, befriend them, give them the kindness that we all felt was wholly lacking during our first year.  For me, that will be the best revenge.

My writing was ok the first year.  I was really unhappy with one story, elated with another, and fairly mediocre on the rest.  That's how it usually works.  Most of them are sitting in a box in my office for later revision.  I have to let stories sit and marinade in a sense.  I'll go back in a few months, look at a crap-story and say, "ah hah!  I know how to fix this gigantic pile of poo." 

I need to do more writing this summer.  I have lots of ideas and no discipline.  I hope to change that right now.  Off I go to type out 1000 words.  I hope to get 1000 words a night finished every night.  Of what?  Of anything. 

Nite!

I'm doing an essay on Jainism and how Gandhi used Ahimsa (non-violence/non-harm) to protest British rule in India.  I have to say, I'm developing an all new level of respect for this guy.  Just sayin' . . . with all the violence in the world today, we could use a little love for the "whole" in our lives.