Ramblings

Friday, 10 July 2009

  • Freckles!

    Good lord.  I've been taking E to the pool pretty much every day now (unless it's rainy/stormy, etc.)  It's a block away.  Our rental company covers the fees because it's an HOA / community pool, so it's free!  I was there the other day, sitting on the bench while my daughter squealed with glee in the kiddie pool.  I looked down and saw a freak-load of freckles on my legs.  I have them on my arms/shoulders and used to have a lot on my face growing up, but never on my legs.  Never.  And now?  Freckles gallore.

    Here's a pic.  Unfortuntely, it was hard for me to capture the freckles in the right light, so I ramped up the contrast to bring them out.  I'm not kidding.  Just send me to Sawyer and we'll get rid of the other Freckles.  Mmm, yeah.

    Click on the pic for the bigger one.  You can see 'em better.




  • Grrr

    I applied for financial aid back on May 4th.  I am still waiting for my summer aid to come in.  Why?  Because the director of financial aid is in charge of 3 different sites.  He spends 1 day a week in my city, so he's just always behind on his paperwork.

    Nice.  Assmunches.  Get your butts in gear.  I'll be done with class by the time it goes through.

Wednesday, 08 July 2009

  • Irons in the Fire

    Sometimes I think that I'm not really a happy person unless I'm going 15 things at once.  I've formally applied to the teaching licensure program at CSU.  My schedule for the next 2 years is going to be friggin' insane.  I'll have my 3 MFA classes per semester.  I have 7 classes that are pre-req's that I must complete by next Fall.  Then, I have the lisencure classes themselves.

    Fall Semester:
    1 class through CU online (pre-req.) - Shakespeare for majors
    1 pre-req - Teaching Reading
    MFA - 3 classes

    Spring Semester:
    MFA - 3 classes
    1 pre-req - Adolescent Lit.
    1 pre-re1 - Teaching Composition

    Summer Semester
    Phase 1:
    3 Licensure Classes
    Phase 2:
    4 Licensure Classes

    Fall (2010)
    MFA (3) - including a "how to teach creative writing class" and a form/technique class. 
    2 Pre-req's - Grammar class / Survey of American Literature Class

    Spring 2011
    MFA (3)
    3 licensure classes

    Fall 2011
    Student Teaching

    Now, each semester, I'll be helping teach the workshops at the county detention center.
    I'm going in for a job interview tomorrow for a part time job.  It will be teaching adults Microsoft Office.
    I have a 2 year old.
    I have a husband.
    I need sleep.
    I still need to write.

    Gonna be a fun ride!

Tuesday, 07 July 2009

  • the Stupidity of Teachers

    My World Mythology teacher is an idiot.  She lost all respect in my eyes after yesterday's class.  She said that Eskimos would kill their babies or their young if the food ran out.  Since infants don't have teeth to chew meat, many died.  WTF?  I guess Eskimo women don't have breasts? 

    I'm still trying to make myself believe she was kidding or something.  I have a bad feeling that she was dead serious.



  • Picture Blog

    It's been a while since I've done some photos.  I took a few tonight while downtown with the family.

    Surrender!


    Reflection


    Reflection #2


    Self Portrait

    E and the flowers


    Swinging!


    Just for kicks.  :)


    A fun place J and I want to check out sometime...
     



Sunday, 05 July 2009

  • New Trailer

    MOON



    This looks great!  I love me some psychological sci-fi.  Too bad it hasn't been promoted for caca.  I think it's already out in limited released and will likely be gone before I can see it.  But, it'll have a spot in my Netflix queue when it hits DVD.

Thursday, 02 July 2009

  • MFA Year One (Complete)

    I've been thinking a lot about my first year in the MFA program at CSU.  The thing is, most of what I'm contemplating isn't good.  When I entered into the program, I was under the impression that I would really be working on the elements of my craft, gaining insight into creative criticism and learning more about the nuts and bolts of creative writing.  In terms of workshop alone, I am coming away from the first year with a great deal of frustration.  I'm disheartened by the whole experience on a whole.

    The first semester of workshop was the hardest.  My story was up first for workshop.  I offered to go first because I had some material ready to go that I had written over the summer.  The folks who had been in the program for a year already (we'll call them 2nd year peeps,) pretty much destroyed the story.  I've had stories mauled and broken apart in the past, but never in a really nasty way.  It was like they discussed things before class and said, "let's make sure we teach these first years who's boss."  It was that bad.  I had people coming up to me after class saying, "I really don't want to go now.  Geesh, that was harsh.  Are you ok?"

    I was fine.  I know my work is solid. 

    The bad part about going first is that I couldn't really judge my fellow writers.  You can tell a lot about someone by what they write.  You tend to listen more to the writers who have a grasp of their craft, who write in a similar style as you (or who take risks and aren't afraid of failing.)  You can always tell who is serious and who isn't.  And by the end of the first semester, I had a list in my head:

    List 1: the people I completely ignore because they're clueless or purposely nasty. 
    List 2: the people who sometimes get it and sometimes don't, but have a good comment or two on occasion. 
    List 3: the people who get it, but have "likes and dislikes" that are too rigid for them to really open themselves up.  For example, I wrote a short story in 2nd person and one girl hates 2nd person stories, so she pretty much disliked the entire thing.
    List 4:  the people who get it, who really rock, who love their craft, who fail miserably at times and succeed just as often.  The people who pay attention, who offer wonderful insight, who are respectful.

    Thankfully, most of my fellow first years fall onto list 4. A few do not, but they are more lazy and/or antisocial for the most part and usually don't offer much in terms of class discussion anyway.  But, they're not bad peeps, just kind of scattered to the four-winds at times.

    Most of the second year students fell into the nasty categories.  As the semester progressed, this became more and more evident.

    The second semester, it was well-nigh hammered into place: nailed down, glued on.  They're jerks.  That was really the final assessment.  There was one exception, a girl in class named Mandy.  Mandy is one of those people who can whip out a short story in 2 hours and dazzle everyone.  She's sweet, kind, insightful and sickeningly GOOD at what she does.  She wins all the program contests, scholarships, gets published once a month.  Yeah, one of those kind.  But, she never reminds you of her successes, never rubs it in and always has amazing feedback to give you on your stories.  She is what I expected 2nd year MFA students to be.    The rest seemed like wastes of air.

    So, that dynamic followed us through two semesters.  I finally got up the nerve to talk to a few of the first years about their experiences and learned (gasp) that most of them felt exactly the same way. 

    The silver lining in all of this is that we all agreed to welcome the first year folks this year (as we are not the second year peeps.)  We will welcome the living heck out of them.  We've decided to meet once a week (or every other week,) at a designated place to discuss writing or life or whatever we want--to get to know one another.  We will take them under our wings and show them the ropes, encourage them, befriend them, give them the kindness that we all felt was wholly lacking during our first year.  For me, that will be the best revenge.

    My writing was ok the first year.  I was really unhappy with one story, elated with another, and fairly mediocre on the rest.  That's how it usually works.  Most of them are sitting in a box in my office for later revision.  I have to let stories sit and marinade in a sense.  I'll go back in a few months, look at a crap-story and say, "ah hah!  I know how to fix this gigantic pile of poo." 

    I need to do more writing this summer.  I have lots of ideas and no discipline.  I hope to change that right now.  Off I go to type out 1000 words.  I hope to get 1000 words a night finished every night.  Of what?  Of anything. 

    Nite!

Monday, 29 June 2009

  • Gripe time...

    I just need to vent a bit, so forgive the bitching.

    I'm pissed at my father for being unavailable on my daughter's birthday.  He can't even remember the day, but decides (after I invite him to the party,) to go to Vegas instead to gamble.  It just brings back memories of him never being there, of his kids just being an afterthought.  I've had to work hard to stay in contact with him (if I don't, I won't ever get to see him.)  I love him, but I don't LIKE him right now.  I just wanted my baby girl to see her grandpa, the one she never gets to see.  Always an excuse.  It was the same thing when I was younger, after my folks split.  Always an excuse. Always had to meet on his time, when he just showed up out of the blue.

    Why do people do this shit?  Why do I have to be the one to cater to everyone else?  I go visit everyone.  I drive here. I drive there.  I have to rearrange my life in order to appease everyone else.  Want to see a friend?  I can go visit THEM.  Want to see family?  I can drive TO them.  I take someone's recommendations under consideration (go to this restaurant, go see this movie, watch this show,) and they always have an excuse as to why they can't try something I've offered.  It's too weird.  I don't like x_director.  Naww, just not interested.

    Here's an idea, stop recommending your shit to me when you're unwilling to open yourself up to new shit yourself. 

    I'm just pissed today.  I'm tired of accommodating everyone else.  I'm tired of feeling like shit, of missing people in my life, of wanting to share things with folks and having them tell you to basically fuck off. 

    Anyway, that's my rant.  I know it's all EMO and stuff.  I just had to get it out there in the world.  Maybe I can let it go now.

Sunday, 28 June 2009

  • Gandhi was the Man

    I'm doing an essay on Jainism and how Gandhi used Ahimsa (non-violence/non-harm) to protest British rule in India.  I have to say, I'm developing an all new level of respect for this guy.  Just sayin' . . . with all the violence in the world today, we could use a little love for the "whole" in our lives.

Friday, 26 June 2009

  • Going to Neverland

    I had to throw out some love to Michael Jackson.  The news of his death really hit me yesterday.  I know the man is eccentric, reclusive, (to some) creepy.  But he rocked the music world at a time when I was a young, impressionable girl.  I still have my Thriller album somewhere and I remember listening to that record over and over and over again.  Billy Jean will always be what Michael Jackson is all about.  Hooo hooo hooo.

    Obviously, issues in his past with children is a note of concern.  However, I have never been fully convinced that anything wrong every happened.  There is suspicion, of course.  But, I guess I see it like this.  If someone were to harm my child in a sexual way, there is no amount of money that would ever make that "ok."  The people who accused him of molestation/abuse were all over that "settlement money," money they could have likely obtained in civil court anyway.  Maybe I'm just looking at this all wrong.  Maybe I'm naive, but I honestly think that we will never know the truth.

    What I do know is that Jackson lived a really bizarre life, probably grew up in an abusive family.  Somewhere along the way, I think he reverted back to being a child in his mind, going to a place where he was happy, before the pressures of adulthood.  It's really difficult to say.

    I'm not condoning any ill action toward children.  I'm on board with the belief that child molestors/rapists should be put to death.  I do not believe in rehabilitation for these individuals.  But, I don't think a case has ever been proven against him.  For all I know there could be something out there I'm missing, but the guy was cleared.  I know, I know, so was OJ.  Well, there you have the conflict.

    Anyway, my husband and I both agree.  We're pretty torn up.  And these younger folks who keep making the stupid jokes and the nasty comments, I guess I just have to toss it up to the cliche/tired "generation gap."  I guess you just had to be a child of the late 70's and early 80's to understand?  I don't want to believe that's the case, but I'm seeing otherwise (more often than not.) 



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Monomyth

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    • Birthday: 1/5/1971
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About Me

  • Student of Life. Writer in Training (is any writer ever complete?) Lover of story arcs. Former fortune teller. Gypsy Soul. Ninja-wannabe, Spartan in training. Battle-picker and quiet observer.

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